Oh,doctor I am in a flap I cannot turn this childproof cap I cannot take my medicine So I shall toss it in the bin The beta blockers make me down I am in a study brown. The mini aspirins make me bruise And my mind is quite confused. The ibuprofen hurt my heart Yet without one I cannot start. The thyroxine has no effect So now I feel my life is dreck. The codeine fails to make me high I'm not addicted, though I try. I'll have to take a shot of gin And alcohol will make me sin. I'll go to parties in a dress That makes men's hormones more or less. I'll take a big one home with me, And give him poison in his tea. And when I am in jail at last I'll feel remorse for all my past. For as I suffer dreadful pain God has hit me yet again. It's not enough that I am blind And suffer terrors in my mind Not enough that lovers cruel Give me stick instead of jewels. Or maybe life does not make sense Especially when I feel so tense. Maybe random are my days and my life has gone astray. I think that I shall buy a cat And love it tenderly and chat. But if my cat gives me a scratch... I'll light its tail up with a match. All the world must me obey Else I'll be enraged all day. I want my own way all the time. Other people must conform. I am here and full of ills What do you think of these blue pills? If they take away my heart That at least will be a start. Then they can remove my brain To help me with this damned pain. Why not kill me right away Then I'll be from pain astray?

I was so kind I let sharks bite my legs
I let the swordfish cut my skin
I  let my  cats hunt for clothes pegs

I gave help to all who  had begged
But one of them sat down in my bin
I was so kind I let sharks bite my legs.

I made myself walk over eggs
And paid children to bring me old tin
I  let my cats play with clothes pegs.

A man  told me he wished I were dead
I decided to live without him
I was so kind I let sharks bite my legs.

My heart felt like a  pellet of lead
So I kicked this man on both his shins
I  let my cats play with clothes pegs.

I will put out the cruel in my bin
And let God decide if they sinned
I was so kind I gave sharks scrambled eggs
I  let my  cats dance with clothes pegs

 

 

 

http://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/body/diet-nutrition/a3137/blender-recipes/

Flour free cakes made with a blender.

Reflecting on  a leaf that lies alone,
Cut off the shrub or tree by wilful wind,
May touch a heart which now feels like a stone.

Beneath our generous flesh there lie our bones
Within a skeleton, a heart we find,
Reflecting on  a leaf that lies alone

From our lungs, we hear pathetic groans
As all the certainties once strong become untied
Then our hearts will feel like cold,  cold stones.

Yet on a kinder wind, red  leaves are borne
And left renewed in places more than kind
Food for ants, no more to lie alone

Inside my heart, an emptiness now yawns
But  like a womb, with rich velvet it’s lined
In truth, a heart is no kin to a stone.

To the dust and ash leaves are consigned
For a former neighbour do they pine?
Reflecting on  a leaf that lies alone
Will touch a heart no longer a cold stone.

Emile woke Mary up at 7am.It was a  Sunday in October, grey and damp.
Go away, she told him.The clock has changed.It’s not 8 am yet.I have to wash my hair as well.Get the Observer out.
I can’t read. the dear animal replied.And why don’t you rebel and stick to Summer Time
I know Stan wanted to send you to Eton but we couldn’t afford it.Yet you understand days and calenders, Mary joked
I can make myself some hot toast, Emile remarked boastfully.
You’ve never eaten it, she murmured fondly
Well, I want to.Let me try it!With butter.
Mary got up and found her fleece dressing gown; it was  brown and covered in coloured spots.She went downstairs and gave Emile a whole kipper.Then she made some tea and took it upstairs so she could drink it while she came round from her dreams
Suddenly Annie ran into  the room wearing a  long black vinyl coat and  red knee-high boots
You never locked the back door, she howled like a wild  leopard which has had no breakfast
I don’t suppose anyone wants my old TV as it is only 19 inches.And my Chromebook is not something worth re-selling.I do have a new coat.
How about Ray Monk’s life of Wittgenstein, Annie asked her defiantly, her apricot lips pouting childishly as the Riemann of Paris lipstick glittered uncannily
The people who might enjoy reading it are by virtue of that , not the sort to steal or buy it on the black market.
That is very racist, Annie told her.You should say. the beige market!
Then nobody would know what I meant, Mary said lovingly
Anyway, do you want to come to Marks with me?They have some lovely coats in
I’d like a pink wool coat, said Mary.
Quite right ,said Annie.Bring back feminine colours
Actually, gay men might like pink coats, she continued.But if they go on the bus they might get dirty.Come to think of it,so will women’s coats
They will have to buy pink puffa jackets and we can wash them at 30 deg.Mary whispered
Using a special detergent, Annie asked?
I have never seen a detergent for washing gay men.I don’t think they will fit into the washing machine.On the other hand, you are small so you will fit in
Shall I get undressed first, Annie asked furtively.
Yes, I’ll try to put you on a rapid wash for 15 minutes but it is your choice.Maybe a bath would be safer?
No problem, said Annie intellectually.Are you having one with me?
You#d better be careful, Mary ad-libbed.It might be sexual harassment.
Well, I am not gay , said Annie.
You never know till you try, Mary giggled ,like a child behind the school canteen
Why, we might become gender fluid and then who knows?
And so say all of us
Miaow,

When the pain of grief is wakened up
And sorrow falls  down like a winter storm
Avoid another’s careless talk and lip.

As we struggle to control our ship
Fearing to be injured, suffer harm
Alas, the pain of grief can waken up.

With endurance, we must be equipped.
And  we must take in both love and balm
Avoid the others’ careless talk and lip.

In our deepest souls, a  wound is ripped
Most soothing  is the singing of the psalms
When the pain of grief is wakened up

By a  rock, an avalanche is tipped
Destroying those who’re trapped within its arms
Avoid the other’s wicked open lips.

By humility, our pain’s disarmed
Being nothing, nothing can do harm
When the pain of grief is wakened up
Do not drink the bitter final cup.

 

We speak in cliches yet we do not know.
The clock change makes us grumble every year,
We say we hate dark nights and   winter snow

If we were original, what show!
The unacknowledged boredom makes us swear,
We speak in cliches but we do not know.

Oh, lovers and strength lost deal many blows.
And life itself will at frail bodies tear
Then we say we hate dark nights and snow

While we’re  living, we will undergo
The changes of the seasons and the years
We speak in cliches; we’re afraid to know.

We have gifts  yet we each suffer blows
Like all  creation, we might live with flair
Though we hate dark nights, the ice, the snow

Inside dwells our soul both frail and bare
Despite its lack, with it we love, revere
We speak in cliches, still afraid to know.
We  reproach the low down sun and snow

 

http://www.bbc.co.uk/poetryseason/poems/nature.shtml