Day: February 24, 2016

True medical comments from doctors to each other

•Discharge status: Alive but without permission.

Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.
• She is numb from her toes down.
• By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped and he was feeling better.
• Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
• On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it had completely disappeared.
• She has had no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
• The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1983.
• Patient was released to outpatient department without dressing.
• I have suggested that he loosen his pants before standing and then, when he stands with the help of his wife, they should fall to the floor.
• The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
• Discharge status: Alive but without permission.
• Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year-old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
• The patient refused an autopsy.
• The patient has no past history of suicides.
• Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital.
• The patient’s past medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.
• She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate directions in early December.
• The patient experienced sudden onset of severe shortness of breath with a picture of acute pulmonary oedema at home while having sex, which gradually deteriorated in the emergency room.
• The patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
• The patient was in his usual state of good health until his aeroplane ran out of gas and crashed.
• When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room

Unusual words

People from the heights of society

Use more Latin words with sobriety.

The plebs just use plain

Anglo Saxon  remains.

So why not use both, for variety?

 

Unusual words may be fun;

Or else they might frighten someone

It’s  background and meaning

Context  and gleaning.

Look one up now and begin.

Dear cat,when old

Photo1341

Lurching yet graceful,  the  old cat sets off.
Slowly he circles the edges of the garden in joy.
In the car, though still in a  closed basket,
He always knew when we came to the turning of the road.
Was it the cherry trees in blossom, a scent
Or something we could never be aware of?
I would open his basket in the car.
He comes out and descends so carefully
Onto the pavement, then tries to bound up the path,
The long wooded back garden is his total joy.
He would sit watching tiny frogs in a deep pond in the sun.
He longed to catch one.
He  brought a robin indoors,
The bird unharmed..
Must have been his gift to me
We released it later after its shock had worn off.
Now he can only hobble,
And soon, his thinness warns me, he’ll be gone.
No cat has ever loved or will love like this cat,
A rescued, terrified animal.
His eyes say all to me.
I look into their clear-jewelled greenness
I look into a deep, still glowing sea of light.
The last day, finally, all day,he’s on my knee.
I say”goodbye, goodbye, Pussy”.
And he’s gone, just before tea.
Now the garden seems empty.
Love leaves a gap.
Love leaves us bare
Love leaves us stripped.
Yet Love is eternal grace.
A mystery of faith.
I believe.

 

Money worries and pain

 

 

 

 

Afternoon tea is common in England so why not be vulgar and imitate us

http://psychcentral.com/news/2016/02/23/financial-stress-tied-to-perception-of-physical-pain/99534.html

The lure of the moment

 Please throw  you ass on the fire before weeding the paper
 and throw in the towel as well,you might regret it
At home with a bone: my memories of love
Show me some trips and we’ll decide on the lure if the moment
Let the rabid go  out with the  bathwater
We threw that look at him but he was blind to glances
I  throw my problems to the unsolved  part of the world
Throw your cat  through my wedding ring?Are you feeling numb?
Towing aspirin nibblets to the party is the least one can do for a bad-hearted friend
Thumb your nose  and finger your tongue.Do it now, you can’t go wrong.
Thumbs alert: Check if yours are still there and ring 999 to tell the police.
 He gave me pickled wink before dying
Knots can try one gratefully
Fry the nouns in batter and make the verbs a different shape.Ignore the rest
Bite a thumb for fun.Your own
A sound like the bark of a tree entered my ears.What next, a bush coughing?A flower smiling.It beggars relief

Dialect and grief

Between my child self and my adult  lies

A chasm composed of dialect and grief.

Banned from   speaking of my father’s death

Then later of  my natural tongue bereaved.

 

Fished from my poor street,  beloved ones;

Encouraged to become a bureaucrat

Broad accent  mocked   and scorned by  holy nuns.

Confusion in my heart, made sadly  furious   brat.

 

When I returned  to streets of happy play

No longer did I fit my former place.

And I had not got  feel of what to say;

No cliche, proverb or even  a bare phrase.

 

By speaking in the tongue of the elite

My head had separated  from my feet

Language and social class

 

 

Photo0425

Home of   over-educated working class sloth

 

http://www.putlearningfirst.com/language/research/bernstein.html

 

http://hubpages.com/education/Social-Distinctions-in-Language

 

 

What value

What value  is there in a widow’s  hours?

Her love’s gone, now she’s restless in her grief.

Does she from  life’s insanity now  cower?

Or welcome madness as a kindly thief?

 

She sits forlorn and gazes at the trees

From summer ripe to winter bare of leaf.

But no-one  knows  quite what  it is she sees:

Not surfaces but  skeletons beneath.

 

 

Unthinkable,  immeasurable sorrow deep

Uncontainable the cataract released.

Destroying  the tranquillity of sleep.

Suffering which  mere death cannot  make cease.

 

No, elimination of both holy life and   death.

Return of  all that is  to nothingness.