Day: February 9, 2016

I’d rather be a jellied eel

8282959_f520I used to love my mother
but then I got too old.
She didn’t want to feed me
Because I felt the cold.
My feet and hands were purple
which she told me was wrong.
I couldn’t change the colour
so had to change my tongue.
I used to love my father
Until he went away.
They said he’s with the angels
and small girls ought to pray.
And then I loved the cat we had
And all four kittens too…
Until my mother got fed up
and sent them to the zoo.
I said I am disheartened
Life is far too hard…
or else I’m hypersensitive
and must become a bard.
I loved a Spanish waiter.
A young man from Peru.
I loved a lot of others–
No more than ninety two.
That is just an estimate
An average, a norm.
It’s what I told the doctor

When he filled out a form

He said to me,You err,my dear
And I mistook his speech
I thought he meant he loved me.
But he just meant to teach.
What he meant was quantity
is not what we desire..
One man is sufficient
Unless he is a liar.
And in the darkness of the bed
What matters is their smell.
Some men smell like honey..
much more I cannot tell
for though these men pursued me
I had such poor eyesight
I didn’t  see them properly
especially at night..
I was more keen on Wittgenstein.
and whether I am real..
Maybe I’ve gone crackers

And don’t know  I’m surreal

I don’t want any lovers now
for love brought so much pain
I’d rather be a jellied eel
than fall in love again.
But friendliness and welcome
Are what we humans need…
And cats and dogs and willow trees
Which don’t make our hearts bleed.
One man is sufficient
And necessary too..
Without my own sweet husband
whatever would I do?
He listens with his heart and soul
And he is never harsh…
He likes to hear me singing
Across of Southwold Marsh.
He likes to take the ferry boat
Across the River Blythe.
But now I hope the ferryman
will not yet arrive..
We have to cross that river
We have to let life go…
We have to be untied and freed.
We think,but do we know?
In the silvery moonlight,
Time gets her own  way
In the darkness of the night
Time will have her say.
Time has come and gone again
And so the hand descends
So I bid you fond farewell,
We have reached the end.
Oh,wrap me up dear mother
in my winding cloth
Take me in your ancient arms
for I have had enough.
I’ve loved and loved and loved again.
I’ve puzzled and I’ve pained
but all I want’s a writing tool
To write down words again

I trace these dear lines of old age

I’d like to lie beside you,

so we’d be face to face.

Then we could, at last. enjoy

A sweet  visual embrace

Then I take my fingers

way across your brow;

my fingers  linger on your lips-

somewhere,somehow.

.
I trace these dear  lines of old age

which wander round your eyes.

I run my fingers down your nose.

My touch is satisfied.

I’d like to trace your smiling lips.

that look so fine and strong.

With my  own pink finger tips.

Would you think  me wrong?

I’d like to boil your hankies

In an ancient pan

On a big coal fire..

Though the coal fires are long gone.

I’d like to rest my curly head

Upon your bony chest

I’ll test your antiperspirant

And the whiteness of your vest.

I’ll treat you very tenderly

and keep you free of dirt

For as they  used to say one time:

Oh,how real loving hurts!

Proverbs my way

 

  • A house is not a comb
  • A journey of a thousand smiles begins with a single skip
  • A leopard cannot enrage a bot

A little knowledge in a dangerous song ,stirs up the workers and makes life better than wrong

 

A little learning is a dangerous thing; drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring: there shallow draughts intoxicate the brain, and drinking largely sobers us again.

  • A little of what you fancy does you in for good
  • A man with a grammar sees every problem in an email
  • A miss is as good as a file
  • A new broom sweeps the Queen weekly.
  • A nod is as good as a wink to a blind Nors
  • A person is known by the company he keeps waiting
  • A picture is worth a thousand words 
  • A place for everything and everything is effaced
  • A poor workman always blames his school
  • A problem shared is a problem dared

God is not very nice.

Pray ,Father.

I am praying.

I want to confess.

Not again.

That’s not very nice.

God is not very nice.

I’ve already deduced that.

Well, stop confessing so much.It’s a form of narcissism , you know

You mean it makes us think if ourselves too much?

Exactly.I believe it’s best to forget yourself and get immersed in something like learning Chinese or painting or your work, of course.

Or men  or women?

Or those whose gender is fluid…that is something to think about

I’d prefer not to.Yet I know some folk are born with differently configured private parts.

I know.That must be tough.Althiugh better nowadays.

Well, that took my mind of my sins.

We were raised to believe God was always watching us but, in fact, it’s one part of us is watching the other parts.

Yes,I can see how wrong that could be if frequent.

So from now on,confess only annually.Amen

 

 

 

 

The most useful proverbs for English language students

 

http://www.fluentu.com/english/blog/useful-english-proverbs/

 

They say it’s a good way to learn English.

EXAMPLE

The pen is mightier than the sword

That is a good one and by learning a few by heart you can make your voice mightier than the aggression of the nasty or bad tempered.Of course we never err ourselves!

 

Yet all human lovers

I didn’t know I’d love you

With both my heart and mind

Every love is different

Each is a special kind

 

I didn’t know I’d miss you

In quite the way I do.

For we can’t  feel emotion

Before its time is due.

 

And are you missing me now

Despite angelic hosts?

They  may care for you ,dear

But I think I cared the most.

 

Yet all human lovers

Must part and go their ways.

Some may die and fall to dust

Some may go astray.

 

I didn’t know I’d love you

And hurt invade my heart.

I didn’t know that  you’d love me.

But  we would have to part.

 

From mother and her bosom

From father and his strength

We  lose and gain throughout our life

Whatever is its length.

 

I didn’t know I’d miss you

With all my loving heart.

But . as we’re made of fragile flesh.

Humans  must  sadly part.

 

If you had been a sadist

If you had been unkind.

I would not now be grieving

And half losing my mind.

 

So maybe I should be grateful

For being found and known.

I wish you were still sitting here.

And I were not alone.

 

When we feel so lonely

No-one else will do.

It’s not that I am just lonely.

I’m lonely, just for you.

 

In the wet and stony

Pathways we must go

We must keep on walking;

Be patient  when we’re slow.

 

The inner force is working

To make new maps for me.

Wherever they shall guide my steps,

With you I’ll  long to be.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Elegance lies bare

Apple tree and sunshine

In summer time when sun do shine

I’m happy on my own

I gaze up through red maple leaves

All transparent in the sun.

But when winter comes I’m lonely

Sitting here beside my fire.

So I want a  winter lover

To keep my spirits higher.

Oh,my winter love come to me

And I’ll gaze deep into your eyes

The light that shines in there

Is so much warmer than my fire.

We’ll go through wintry woodlands,

Where elegance lies bare.

The branches struck by sun

Now feel the frosty grasp of air.

I’ll love you all the winter time.

I’ll love you  in the dark.

I’d like to rest within your arms,

And have a peaceful talk

When summer comes I’ll disappear

To roam across the dales

I’ll sleep on heather moorlands

And send you loving mail.

I can’t be tied in summertime

I must be roaming free.

But ,if you accept this  need of mine,

To you I’ll faithful be.

Dealing with a nasty remark

 

 

 

 

I read a new way of how to respond  if anyone says something unkind or unpleasant.

You memorise a proverb and instead of defending yourself from what they said you say:

Many hands make light work

A stitch in time saves  nine.

Or you could say anything as long as it is  unrelated to what they said and is undefensive

The idea seems to be that it will throw them off track.I’ve not tried it as yet but will report of I do.Fortunately I don’t often come  into contact with very nasty people much.It might be useful on the bus as sometimes people are rude there.

When nuisance callers stay on your line after you press the red button

ENDING A CALL: Turn off the power  if it’s a cordless phone.

This has happened to me.The operator said they don’t quite know how it  is done but it’s to with them being computer generated.The call remained on my line until I switched off the electricity where the base phone is connected.

On certain types of phone you can block unwanted calls.If you can’t understand how to do it ask someone to show you.It’s the best way  although no doubt they can call from a different number.