Good evening.Do you come here often?My name is Harold,by the way.
No,I’ve never been here before,Harold.How about you?By the way my name is
Anita del Oranges.
Yes,Anita,I know Judy and Jim very well..in fact she was my first wife.
How many wives have you had,Harold,or is that intrusive?
I’m not sure.Five wives I think but I’m divorced now.
So are you still hoping to find a new lover?
Well,if one came along I’d be keenly intrigued.
After five divorces can you say why your marriages broke down?
I think it was my utter laziness.
Don’t you have a job?
Yes,I’m a doctor.
I’ve seen you in the Clinic…
I didn’t see your face..
No,I know.But you can see it now…why do you say you are lazy?
I want you to know I won’t do any housework after we get married but I’ll pay for help.
Is that a proposal?
Well,my mind was flowing that way.. you are a charming lady.
I might be a psychopath.
Well,that would make a change!
I might be cruel..
I can ignore that.
And I wear a wig…
I look forward to removing it at night…
I may be bald..
Well,I am bald.
This is a strange way to talk to a person you never met before..
Well, you are a stranger..so I talk strangely to you..I learned that in neuro-linguistic programming classes
I’m coming to the Clinic on Monday.
What for,angel?
Don’t you keep records?
Yes,I still have all Mozart’s stuff.
You didn’t catch my drift……
I never go with the flow.
Well,I admire that in a man.Self control can take its toll though.
So,how about a meal at the Ritz?
I’m on a fast right now but I’ll call you when I am meating again.
You look like a thin lady to me.
But I am quite fat underneath this camouflage…
Intriguing…May I underdress you?
You seem quite naughty…
I’m just pretending.I’m quite Victorian in fact..
Well,send me an email about yourself…what you love and hate.What you read.What you eat
What’s your address?
Fierylady.hot@myfemale.org
Or phone me on
0207 pi
Let’s pretend it’s a rational phone number
Let it ring forever.
For forever I’ll be loving you.
You stick to me like UHU,my glue!
Your heart is warm..
Rest in my arms like a dying sheep.
Embrace me now,I love your how!I hate your similes though
Someway,somehow.We’ll get through
Oh,dear.look at the time.I have to go home and prove Herbert’s Last Theorem.
You are a very foreign person…I can’t translate you at all.
Don’t you do foreign languages here?
Well,there are so many of them.
Ain’t it fun?
I speak a dialect common only to a couple of square miles of Greater Manchester.
You make me feel so blung.
I am your song to be sung.
When will you have rung?