Buy Monet

Teacher why have you brought that tin of pencils into the classroom?

Because I want to draw my own conclusion

Teacher why have you brought a telescope today?

Student: because I’m going deaf.

Teacher: what will you bring with you if you go dumb? 

Teacher: as you look into the distance the road seems to get narrower

Student I hope it’s not a Mobius strip

Teacher :why have you climbed on top of t?he cupboard?

Student: I want to see life from a different perspective.

Teacher: why have you brought your cat to school today?

Student: Because I can’t bring it yesterday

Teacher: why have you brought a flashlight to school?

In case anyone gets lost in thought.

Teacher I wonder who will be top of the class?

And we wonder who will be the bottom

Teacher today we will study the existence of God.

Student I just don’t believe it.

Teacher well we have run out of text books so I want you to use your imagination.

So you want me to imagine that God exists?

Teacher:If we keep practising every day then there may be an effect.

I hope the government doesn’t say that when the grain runs out.

Teacher :’imagine free school dinners for all

I just can’t believe it

Now Thomas you must try harder.

Jesus wept

Where is the headmistress?

She has been in a brown study all day.

Now girls I’m going to give you all the tension.

You mean Attention ?

I mean all my tension.

She got out on the wrong side of the dead this morning

Is it her husband?

No she buried him

Oh my lord, was he dead?
Well he is now.

I think you are differently labelled.

Is it the spelling terrors?

Yes and the compound interest

You really do pay for your mistakes